21st Century Fox, Part 2 -- THE ISO AUDIT

Written by Jeff Hartt.
Thanks Jeff!

This story takes place after the Wednesday, March 10th comic, after Johann and Veronica return to the lunar base.

Week 10: Monday

Panel 1: [V standing next to J at J’s station, J smiling, V serious]

J: Hi, Veronica!
V: Bad news, Johann. We’ve been summoned to an ISO audit by the QA dept.
J: Why is that bad? I’ve been through ISO audits before.
Panel 2: [Johann looking scared. V still serious.]
V: The QA department ensures compliance with all station procedures, including moral codes of conduct.

Panel 3: [J looking grim]
V: You’ve been through an ISO audit before?
J: I know the rules: Answer only direct questions. Answer only the direct question.

Panel 4: [V flying down hallway. J with arms around her waist]
J: They couldn’t have picked an unhappier bunch, could they?
V: Nope. Everyone hated QA even before the moral standards.

Week 10: Wednesday

Panel 1 (full page width): [Several hallways on left side of room. All have doors open. A is smallest hallway, B larger, etc. Center of room has a lion sitting behind a desk, frowning. He’s wearing a button. Lion has frilly Elizabethan royalty style collar. Also wearing gloves. Otherwise dressed in Logan’s Run Policeman’s uniform. He’s reading a newspaper. To his right are 2 boxes with yet unreadable text. V and J flying in from right.

Panel 2: [More detail. Newspaper is “New Predator’s Times.” Button says “2 ½”. Labels on boxes “Cheesy Mouse Kabobs!” on one, “Bloated Vampire Bats, Secret Surprise Center!” on the other. V and J have landed on 2 ½’s desk, looking up at him.
V: We’re here . . .
2 ½: Room 101, Hallway A. You’re late.

Panel 3: [V and J landing in Hallway A entrance.]
J: What’s up with him?
V: He the new department secretary. Rumor has it he’s been declawed and belled. Off of Earth he can hide them but still can’t remove them.

Panel 4: [J cupping hands to yell into room. V surprised]
J: Veronica, did you know that Lion Law legally recognizes a mouse’s aid to any lion!?

Panel 5: [View from room, 2 ½’s desk in foreground, Hallway A entrance in background. 2 ½ looks up from newspaper, thoughtful]
2 ½ (thinking) : 1 + 1 = 2 ½?

Panel 6: [Same view, 2 ½’s eyes open in shock]
J: And mice love the taste of leather!
2 ½: 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 + 1 = 5 !!!!!

Panel 7: [Perspective from inside hallway A. J reaching out, has door handle.]
2 ½ (in the distance): Say! I. .

Panel 8: [J slams door closed, looks angry]

Panel 9: [V with head cocked sideways, talking to angry looking J. Both walking down hallway]
V: So you’re not going to help him?
J: Not this mouse.

Week 10, Friday

Panel 1: [V animated, J angry, walking down hall]
V: But he’s harmless! Was it those boxes? They’re just fakes! Props!
J: I don’t think so.

Panel 2: [V looks shocked]
J: I recognized the brand. They’re from the Celebes where food content laws are not enforced.

Panel 3: [V looking very angry.]
V: (Blood dripping from letters) : Really?

Panel 4: [J looking at V]
J: Not feeling like helping him?
V: He’s better not a thorn into my parlor.

Week 11: Monday

Panel 1: [Looking obliquely towards exit from Hallway A into a room. Hallway A ends on table top. 2 small chairs are on table. To right, the table drops down in a “step” to a square depression where 2 slightly larger chairs are located. Hallway B ends at a lower level for slightly larger animals to take those chairs. Joe looks surprised]

Panel 2: [View from behind Joe and V looking down the length of the room at the exits for Hallways C through H. Each hallway enters at a lower level. Each lower level has slightly bigger chairs. On the right side is a series of desks with chairs behind them, all empty. All desks are at the same height.
J: What is this place?
V: The interrig. . . QA interview room. The idea is to allow the QA manager at the desk to tower over any creature that is here for an interview.

Panel 3: Front view of J and V looking down the length of room. V looks surprised.]
J: Hmm. I don’t know if that would work for Cecil. He’s a good 18 feet tall. They’d have to lower the floor for him.

Panel 4: [V and J looking at each other.]
V: Cecil? Cecil Stewart?
J: Glibert and Sullivan?
V: I repaired his horn not long before I left!

Panel 5: [View from behind J and V, sitting in chairs on table top. In distance, a rhino is striding up to the table]
J: Cecil and his partner Jack are great guys!
V: Jack! He’s going out with my best friend!

Panel 6: [Side view of table. Rhino talking at the two]
R: So you two were roving on the moon for 10 days together, but didn’t have time to find out your best friends knew each other?
J: I guess the subject of opera-loving giraffes never came up.

Week 11: Wednesday

Panel 1: [Rhino looking angry. Has sheaf of papers in front of him]
R: Enough chitchat. I assume you know why you are here.

Panel 2: [Closeup on J and V looking blankly at R]

Panel 3:
R: You two spent quite a bit of time together on Archelon. And here on the station both before and after your trip.

Panel 4: [Same as Panel 4]

Panel 5: [R squinting at J and V]

Panel 6: [R shuffling papers, looking at them]
J: I’m sorry, did you have a question?
R: (thinking) Plan B, where’s Plan B?

Week 11: Friday

Panel 1: [R talking to V and J]
R: What happened to the microphones on the Archelon?
V: What do you mean?

Panel 2: [Closeup on V]
R (off screen) : Half the audio sensors on the ship are shorted out!
V: Oh! That must be from my sonar expansion course. I’m trying to pick up frequencies just outside my range, so I have to use high decibel levels.

Panel 3: [Same]
R: There’s practically no audio logs at all of your trip!
V: I’m so sorry. I guess the microphones just weren’t up to spec.

Panel 4: [J looking surprised]
J: When did I think I was the smart one?
V: Whoever approved the installation of shoddy audio sensors should be held accountable!
R: That’s none of your concern!

Week 12: Monday

Panel 1: [Closeup on V and J. J talking]
R (from off screen) : Did anything unusual happen during your trip?
J: Well there were the heavy metal contaminants, the crash rescue. . .
R: (from off screen): I mean between you two!

Panel 2: [V and J looking at each other]

Panel 3: [Pull back to show all three. V and J look at R. R slaps table with his hand]
V: Such as?
R: Did you two have a romantic liaison?

Panel 4: [Closeup of V and J looking at each other]

Panel 5: [V and J laughing uproariously]

Panel 6: [Pull back. R angry]
R: I’m serious!
V and J: (Laughing harder)

Week 12 Wednesday

Panel 1: [Closeup on V]
V: So you’re accusing me of having an affair with a food source?
R: That’s not what I’m saying!

Panel 2: [Pull back]
V: So would be kind of like you having romantic thoughts about savannah grass?
R: Uh, no, not like that at all!

Panel 3: [R looking serious]
V: Any more questions?
R: Just one.

Panel 4: [Closeup on V looking shocked]
R (from off screen) : Can you explain why Archelon’s ship’s medical stores was short 2 units of mouse blood and 2 units of UBR when you got back?

Panel 5: [V nervous]
V: Uh. . .
J (from off screen) : ** SIGH **

Panel 6: [V looking at J. J looking despondent]
J: Flight lessons.

Week 12: Friday.

Panel 1: [R looking at J]
R: What was that?

Panel 2: [J waving arms, angry and animated]
J: I said “Flight Lessons”!
J: I know, I know, “if mice were meant to fly, they would have talons to grab instead of holes to hide in.”

Panel 3: [Closeup on Johann’s face]
J: Well all I've ever wanted to do is fly! That's why I took the job position on the moon. Veronica tried to teach me when I got here but I'm still terrible.

Panel 4: [Pull back to J talking, looking at R. V with wide open eyes]
J: I don't expect you as a rhino to understand, but prey animals know they don't have much to offer anyone. They get stepped on, caught in closing doors, eaten, and generally ignored.
J: Prey animals only succeed by taking the initiative.

Panel 5: [Closeup on J]
J: So I decided to offer Veronica a break from 6 months of a Spamicola liquid diet in return for flight lessons.

Panel 6: [R looking at J, mouth pulled back in horror, eyes wide]
J: And I told her she could sample from anywhere she wanted. R: Anywhere?
V: Hey, he got 2 weeks just for offering!

Week 13 Monday:

Panel 1: [Rhino looking uncomfortable]
R: So, Miss Desmond, did you, uh. . .

Panel 2: [Closeup on V, looking composed]
R: Where exactly, umm. . .
V: Yes?

Panel 3: [V with mouth open in surprise]
R (off screen): Please describe to me exactly what happened.
V: Why Mr. Plasty! Do you want flight lessons?

Panel 4: [Same, V squinting eyes, all teeth showing]
R (off screen): What?! No!
V: Then it’s none of your business.

Week 13 Wednesday:

Panel 1: [R talking loudly to V]
R: This is extermely irregular! The moral code prohibits any actions that could be considered. . .
V: A blood donation?

Panel 2: [Closeup on V]
R: No, it's the appearance of. . .
V: Eating from an earth-standard diet that doesn't result in animal death. I think that's allowed, too.

Panel 3: [R talking to V, looking angry]
R: "The simple fact of the matter is the moral code doesn't allow such behavior"
V: "Except that the moral code is suspended if deemed medically necessary by the medical officer on a vehicle outside the dome."

Panel 4: [Closeup on V, composed]
R: "The medical officer cannot make such a decision."
V: "without approval of the ship commanding officer"
R: "Aha!"
V: "which I was also"

Panel 5: [R with mouth open, eyes wide. No sound coming out.]

Panel 6: [R shuffling papers again]
R: "Moving right along"

Week 13 Friday:

Panel 1: [J taking to R. V with mouth open talking to J.]
J: "I don't understand what the fuss is, Vampire Bats don't prey on mice"
V: "Oh sure they do!"

Panel 2: [J looks wide eyed at V. V talking].
J: WHAT!?!?
V: VBs need 20 grams of blood each day, and a typical mouse has about 40.
R (off screen): "Uh, as I was saying . . ."

Panel 3: [Closeup on J and V faces, J looking uncomfortable]
V: "Of course, in a survival situation, I would assume you were already dead."
J: Uhh…
V: "Now to get all of your blood out, maybe I could hang you by your feet cut your cartoid,”

Panel 4: [J has big pupils, V is chewing her upper lip]
R (offscreen) : Look if we could just. . .
V: I’d also shave your head fur with my shaving teeth?
J: Teeth?

Panel 5: [Closeup of V smiling at J from 2 inches away, showing her fur shaving teeth with a drop of blood decending on it]
V: See?

Panel 6: [Vew from behind V and J’s chairs as J plops over backwards in faint. Feet are in the air. V smiling, R uncomfortable]

Week 14: Monday

Panel 1: [R talking to V]
R: "Uh, Is he OK? V: Oh, he does that all the time!"

Panel 2: ]Closeup on V, arms in air excitedly, J’s feet still propped up by chair.]
R: "Well if we can get back to the subject"
V: "But you would be a different story!

Panel 3: [R looks up from papers.]
R: Excuse me?
V: Now what would be the most efficent way to clean out your hemoglobin?

Panel 4: [Closeup on V, calculating look.]
R: Heh, you couldn't even get through my skin!
V: Please, you have eye sockets, don't you?
R: "Um, you know, I really"
V: Maybe some sort of pumping system, or nanobots breaking down all tissue.

Panel 5: [R looking ill, looking away from V]
R: "I'm not really feeling"
V: Just think, you could feed a colony of 100 Vampire Bats for a week!

Panel 6: [Same view as panel 5, this time with empty chair facing V]
R: "Thank you for your time, I'm sure you know the way out! Good bye!

Week 14, Wednesday.

Panel 1: [Secretary’s office.2 ½ looking surprised. 2 boxes from table now in trash can, V carrying J in arms as she flies]
2 ½: Say, would you, Oh!
V: He'll be fine, but I should get him down to medical right away, don't you think?

Panel 2: [2 ½ with paw raised, one digit extended. V is now past him]
2 ½: Well, could he. .?
V: Thank you, good bye!

Panel 3: [V landing gently in a random room. Chair against one wall]

Panel 4: [V sitting in chair, head cocked to the side, smiling. J’s head cradled in her lap, just opening his eyes]
V: Wake up, my brave little mouse!

Panel 5: [J’s arms and legs windmilling, V grabbing him tight around the waist, smiling with eyes closed.]

Panel 6: [J sitting in V’s lap. Looking frazzled. V looking confident.]
J: Sorry! Sorry, flashback
V: That's OK, I was expecting it!

Week 14: Friday:

Panel 1: [V now sitting in J’s lap]
J: So you made him so sick he had to leave?
V: Umm, hmm!

Panel 2: [J looks away, eyes big]
J: Wow!
V: I didn’t think you would ever faint! I had to surprise you!

Panel 3: [J looks back, small smile. V fake frustration]
J: You certainly did at that. I suppose I’m getting used to you.
V: Hmmph!

Panel 2: [J with head cocked, looking sideways at V]
J: Now, I thought you didn't want anyone to think of you as a bloodthirsty stereotype?

Pane 3: [V gives a malicious smile.]

Panel 4: [V now looks demure, eyes down]
V: I suppose I'm willing to make exceptions.

Week 15: Monday.

Panel 1 full page width: [Background of aerodrome. 3 circular frames inside panel of closeup of J’s face. Frame 1 shows him grimacing, wind whipping his hair, facing down and left. Frame 2 show more wind on his face, he’s facing straight left. Frame 3 shows him facing up and left, less wind. Connecting all frames is (in large letters)

Panel 2: [J in hang glider, looking straight down. Wearing aviator uniform/outfit. Hang glider is almost vertical, fabric full of air. Sound effect word of POP!. J’s feet reach for circular platform beneath him with a pole supporing it continuing off bottom of page.

Panel 3: [Veronica landing behind J, happy expression.. She’s wearing aviator cap and goggles. Aviator outfit. J standing on platform, looking happily back at V]
V: Wow! You are definitely getting the "hang" of it now.
J: Ugh!
V: Sorry, just had to!

Panel 4: [Closeup on V and J. V has her goggles up.]
V: The mistake I made before was to try to start you on variable wing dynamics.
J: That and I just didn’t understand the physics of flying.

Panel 5: [J looking away, blushing with complement]
V: Maybe, but you’ve got the feel for it now. You were making corrections you probably weren’t even aware of!
J: Well, um, thanks!

Panel 6: [Back to full view of both, V looking out at aerodrome, J looking to V in alarm]
V: You won't be using variable wings to fly on Earth anyway, so fixed wing is the way to go.
J: Wait a minute! Me, fly, Earth? Same sentence?

Week 15 Wednesday:

Panel 1: [V turns back to J. J looks happier]
V: Didn't I tell you? We're going to the "Flight Lover's Roost" on the Big Island. We flying enthusiasts need to stick together, you see.
J: Oh, I do see!

Panel 2: [V closes eyes in rapture, visualizing. J looks less confident.]
V: We'll hit the Hiilokaili cliffs at dawn, just the two of us, the ocean breeze, and 1500 feet of volcanic cliffs to play with!
J: Barber’s Beaches!

Panel 3: [V looks back at J, smiling]
V: You’ll do just great!
J: Well, a little fear will certainly help my focus.

Panel 4: [V looks sideways at J, smiling. J looking back]
V: We could always go back to Moonbase Alba, you could ask for a little “enhancement”.
J: Oh, no! I like being a white mouse, not a glow-in-the-dark vampire bat.

Panel 5: [V and J smiling, faces close]
V: Good! I like you as a white mouse, too.

Panel 6: [Just smiling at each other]

Week 15: Friday:

Panel 1:
J: We may have to spend extra time together these next 3 months.
V: Practicing, of course.
J: Of course!

Panel 2: [J with hang glider ready, moving forward, looking forward. V looking curious, adjusting her goggle down]
J: Now I can't see how it's fair, though.
V: How's that?

Panel 3: [ J flying ahead of V. V looking angry]
J: Look how much wing surface area I have compared to you. You'll be lucky just to stay in my backdraft.
V: Excuse me?

Panel 4: View from in front of J, V flapping behind J.
J: Please speak up, you're falling too far behind.
V: You could have a rhino-sized paper plate for an airfoil and you still wouldn't outfly me.

Panel 5: [J and V spiraling upwards in updraft, view from below]
J: I'm just trying to let you down easy. Besides, if you can't teach me to fly better than you, wouldn't that be the teacher's fault?

Panel 6: [J and V high up, small. Still spiraling upwards.]
V: You would like to think so!
J: Could be!

Big ISO Is Watching!

21st Century Fox